September 15th 2019
P. Brady is working in Tynemouth on a building site. It is a pleasant surprise to see him in a local bar one night. He hasn’t changed in nearly 25 years. As the last bell sounds I ask him what he’s doing in the morning – I’m playing a gig on the beach to advertise the barbershop; it’s a silly idea, but, you know…
“I’d like to, but I’m going to Exeter,” he says.
“Exeter?”
“Yeah, I’ve got to pick up a present for the boy’s birthday.”
“In Exeter?!”
“I saw a toy horse in a shopwindow there.”
“There’s a toyshop in Tynemouth,” I say.
“Yeah, but I’ve really got my heart set on this one in Exeter.”
September 16th 2019.
A puzzle. Layers of coloured tissue paper, all laid out on top of each other. They are all different shapes – circles, squares, triangles. My task is to arrange them, with tweezers, into a more pleasing construct of colour and shape: to tessellate. It is quiet, thoughtful work. But to what end beyond visual pleasure?
What better purpose could there be?
September 17th 2019.
K. Mac knocks on the door. I’m not so surprised to see her, despite it being 25 years. She wants to use the toilet.
“Does Bob Dylan know that you’re reading his book in the bathroom?” she asks when she comes out.
“Bog Dylan,” is all I can think to say to this.
We both find this possibly the funniest thing ever. We go to bed.
Bog Dylan?! Hilarious!
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Got to love a bit of toilet humour. Bog Dylan did give me a chuckle.
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Funny. I’d never thought it once when awake!
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Hah! Bog Dylan!
Obviously, I’m now mentally running through Mr. Dylan’s oeuvre to see if there’s a title than can be usefully altered. The best I can come up with is ‘Tangled up in Poo’.
Sorry.
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Ha! Excellent, Bill!
‘It Ain’t Wee, Babe’
‘Subterranean Homesick Poos’
-We shall compile the ‘Shittest of Bob Dylan’ album for fun, yes?
Keep on, keeping on
x
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HaHa Clearly, I’m in the presence of a master.
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The Shittest of Bog Dylan compilation ain’t gonna write itself. So, let’s get this started!
Tell Me That It Isn’t Poo (From Nashville Skyline)
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First things first! May I respectfully suggest an alternative choice of title?
Perhaps ‘Bog Dylan’s Greatest Shits’?
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Of course!
Dear Lord, what was I thinking?!
🙂
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(Oops! My last reply developed ideas above its station. It impersonated a comment, and damn well got away with it.)
Side 2 Track 1: It’s All Over Now, Baby Poo.
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Ha ha (dear me!) ha ha!
Perhaps our Bog has been somewhat prescient in anticipating this noble endeavour.
Blowing Off in the Wind (or Blowin’ for the purists who might be reading this)
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Well, this one didn’t take much reworking, Bill. Me and the guys were out of the studio by 3am. Have a listen, see what you think?? Maybe Side 2 Track 2??
“Idiot Wind.”
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Not bad at all. Bog sounds, appropriately, a tad constipated though.
Here’s an introspective, nakedly self-analytical song from The Freewheelin’ Bog Dylan:
Side 2 Track 3: Bog Dylan’s Poos.
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🙂
A great release, Bill. Congratulations!
Side 2 Track 4: Leopard-Skid Pillbox Shat.
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A masterful selection, Nick. Masterful!
Here is yet another song from ‘The Freewheelin’ Bog Dylan’, and an agreeable neighbour to Track 4.
(Notably covered by Dolly Fartone – a typically powerful, lingering performance).
Side 2 Track 5: Don’t Think Twice, It’s All Shite.
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🙂
Yes, Bill. Still lingering … But I think that Dolly has covered it enough, so perhaps it’s safe for something from Bog’s Nashville Skyline period?
Side 2 Track 6: I Poo It All Away.
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Another excellent choice, Nick, and a song which Bog played at the Isle of Shite festival, I believe?
What’s more, being a lament for lost (but fondly remembered) excrement, a fitting choice for the album’s final track.
It merely remains to ask for Bog’s permission to release this tribute to his scatological lyrical explorations.
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Bill!
What can I say!? You have saved the best ’til last; the ace in the pack! – The ‘Isle of Shite Festival’ has had me amused for the whole of the last day! And continues to do so – I will, (oh, no doubt) be working this nugget into any future conversation should the mention of IOS arise!
Yes, we should get our people to talk to Bog’s people and, hey, you know, get this shit together!
Keep on, keeping on!
Nick
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